i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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