i don't like sucking hair
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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