I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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