Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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