whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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