I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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