Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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