I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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