So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize