Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
This is not my ceiling
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
