i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Randomize
