And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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