Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
