Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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