i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Randomize
