dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
