i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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