you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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