Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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