I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
