If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
