i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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