That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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