Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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