he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
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