Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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