party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
