walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
