Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
