Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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