so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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