i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
