I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
