Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
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