Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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