You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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