Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
