Where did you get a picture of my penis
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
