bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I just blew my weed a kiss
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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