He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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