Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
