Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
one two three fourrrrnication!
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
