I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
