I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
