It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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