Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Dignity is for republicans.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Randomize
