I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
