You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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