also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize