Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
