tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
